Yours All Along
by tamyyiia
Summary: "I won't ever forget the gift you're giving my brother."Izaya gave a short laugh. "it's not really a new gift. It's been his for years." Warnings: Character death, Yaoi, Shizaya, angst, hospitals and sad things.
1. Chapter 1

**Yours all along**

Doctors and Nurses rushed in and out of crowded hospital rooms and crowded wards. There were hardly any spare bed in the hospital. This is how it always was, this is how it had always been but Izaya had a whole room to himself. He'd paid a ridiculous amount of money so that his precious humans wouldn't see him in such a state. He had a reputation to uphold after all. His room looked more like a hotel's than a hospitals, if it wasn't for the machines hooked up to him he might even believe that it was.

Izaya hadn't been seen in Ikebukuro for over four months, since his latest fight with the strongest man. Many thought that he had been injured by the blonde bartender but that wasn't true. He'd just…overexerted himself and got hit by a vending machine that was a little too hard to dodge. His depth perception had been a little off that day.

He'd broken his arm and fell unconscious, normally he would have gone to Shinra for treatment but one of his little humans had called an ambulance. Izaya was taken to the local hospital and once there…he had not been allowed to leave.

He'd been hiding it for years, his illness. The little abscess on his brain that grew and pushed against him, the tumour. Izaya had always knew that he would die young, he was diagnosed at age six and his parents were told to prepare themselves for his inevitable death.

From that day Izaya had decided, he would not let the tumour win. He'd do everything in his power to survive and if he was to die he'd live all of his days as if it was his last. This of course made Orihara Izaya who he was today, the top informant in Tokyo and nemesis to the Monster of Ikebukuro.

Shizuo was another reson why Izaya had made it as far as he had. The Blonde had left him intrigued, a human that just wouldn't die. Oh he was jealous, annoyed, excited, frustrated and….attracted to this man.

Yes, he was in love with his monster and when the news hit him…it hit him hard.

Just last week Shizuo had been brought into the same hospital as him. The blonde had suffered a heart attack. They'd found it too late, ironic, you would have thought they'd find it for the amount of times that Shizuo had been in the hospital over the years. But now it was too late. The bartender lay dying in his own Hospital bed, unbeknownst to him, just down the hall from Izaya.

The blonde needed a transplant, as soon as possible. The list was too long, and even then it would be hard to find a match for the blonde. Heiwajima Shizuo would die before the month was out. That was how Izaya had made his decision.

When Shinra, his illegal doctor with his equally illegal fake documents (that Izaya had acquired) came into his room this morning he had a proposition.

Izaya lay his book down on his bed and sighed as he rolled onto his side. Izaya had good days and bad days and today was a good day. His migraine was non-existent and he felt full of energy, almost as if he wasn't dying. _How cruel._

Izaya could hear voices outside his room, probably his plump nurse again. She checked on him regularly to make sure he was comfortable and happy. Izaya liked the woman's company some of the time but too much of her motherly love was smothering.

"I suppose I can make an acceptation for you but he's made it very obvious that he doesn't want visitors." Nurse Akayami was telling someone. Izaya narrowed his eyes in confusion. Sure he had said that he didn't want visitors but nobody knew he was in the hospital either. He'd even used a different name when signing in. "I'll see what he says."

"Thankyou, Akayami-san." A monotone voice replied.

Izaya's door opened and in walked his plump nurse. "Psyche-san, how are you feeling?" She asked him.

Izaya smiled. "As well as can be expected. I overheard you, it seems I have a visitor?"

The middle aged woman nodded enthusiastically, as she adjusted Izaya's bedding. "Yes, a handsome young man. You'll never guess who. I was so surprised to see him." She puffed her short black bob. "Hanejima Yuuhei!"

Izaya blinked in confusion. What was Shizuo's brother doing outside his room? "Really?" Izaya asked his voice a little strained.

"What would you like me to do? Shall I send him in? I know you requested no visitors" She asked as she fluffed up Izaya's pillows.

Izaya shrugged. " Might as well."

Akayami beamed. She had been worried out the pale raven, so young and ill, not wanting to see anyone but his doctors. She'd began fawning over him like a mother. "I'll bring him." She walked back over to the door and opened it wide. "He's agreed to see you." She smiled at the dark haired actor. "But don't excite him too much, Psyche-san needs his rest."

Kasuka walked into the room with a large bunch of flowers. Izaya's eyes widened. "Thankyou for seeing me, Psyche-san." Kasuka said with a bow, the flowers clutched in front of him.

Akayami smiled and left silently, closing the door behind her.

"I brought you some flowers." Kasuka said as he moved forwards, finally seeing the small man in the large bed. His eyes widened in recognition. "Izaya-san…?"

Izaya gave him a small smile. "Kasuka-kun, what a surprise. Is there a reason for your visit?"

Kasuka had composed himself once again but he couldn't help the nagging feeling of betrayal. "Is this a joke?"

Izaya cocked his head to the side in confusion but then it hit him. Shinra had been meddling. "Oh, you talked to Shinra." Izaya breathed. "No, it isn't a joke."

Kasuka made his way over to Izaya's bedside and sat in the armchair next to him, handing him the flowers. "These are to say Thankyou." Kasuka said in a quiet voice.

Izaya laughed and brought them to his face, he wished he could still smell, but sadly that sense had been taken away from him. "They're very pretty." He smiled at Kasuka. "I can't believe Shinra, he promised he wouldn't tell."

"He didn't tell me your identity. Izaya-san, are you really going through with this?"

"I'm dying, Kasuka-kun. There's nothing that can be done for?" Izaya smiled sadly. "I'm just sad I won't be around to see his face when he realises." Izaya said as he tried to make it seem like that was another of his games but Kasuka easily saw through him.

"Shinra mentioned that you're in love with my brother."

Suddenly Izaya's neck and face turned a bright pink. "Kasuka-kun, you can't believe everything that sketchy doctor tells you. ~ "

Kasuka blinked and nodded. "Shizuo-nii is sleeping right now. Would you like to see him?" He asked.

Izaya heart thumped loudly as it skipped a beat. He was speechless; the great Orihara Izaya had been made speechless! Izaya bit the inside of his cheek and gave a curt nod. The actor didn't show any emotion as he picked up thee flowers and lay them on the table. "There's a wheelchair in the closet." Izaya pointed.

Kasuka brought the wheelchair over to the bed silently as Izaya detached himself from his bedding. He felt like crying when he realised that he couldn't make his legs work properly. They just didn't want to move on their own. He sat up and lifted his legs one by one over the bed frame. Kasuka positioned the chair by the bed and gave his arm to Izaya as the small man lowered himself into the chair. All thoughts of Izaya faking it went out the window.

Kasuka didn't try to make small talk as he wheeled Izaya out of his room and down the hall. It was cold outside of his bed sheets and Izaya couldn't help the shiver that went down his spine. Seeing this, Kasuka slipped the large trench coat off his shoulders and wrapped it round Izaya like a blanket.

"Thanks…" Izaya blushed.

The younger Heiwajima nodded in acknowledgment and turned them both around as he backed into Shizuo's room. Izaya's ears picked up the sound of a steady beep from the heart monitor that Shizuo was hooked up too. Izaya was glad he didn't need his on, it was irritating. Kasuka pushed him over to the small bed in the middle of the room. Shizuo had his own room with a large window to the outside world. Kasuka had obviously gone private for the blonde.

Izaya looked up at the blonde man. For being the strongest man in Ikebukuro he sure looked vulnerable. He was paler than when Izaya had last seen him, his skin had a sickly tint to it and he looked thinner too. His hair was lank and the roots were showing. Izaya reached over and laid his hand on top of the blondes.

Izaya couldn't stop his emotion flowing over as his eyes teared up and his throat clenched painfully. It felt as if someone was squeezing his heart as he looked down at the man that had been his strength. He gripped Shizuo's hand and brought it down so that he could give the palm a little kiss. The blonde didn't stir.

"He can never know." Izaya said as he clutched the hand to his face. Shizuo's hand felt warm against his cheek as it soaked up his tears.

Kasuka didn't say anything as he turned his back on the image of the crying informant. The world was too harsh and in that moment he wanted to curse god for his cruelty and Izaya for his stupidity. He wished that there was something he could do so that they could both live happy long lives.

They stayed like that for almost two hours. Izaya silently crying and trying to hold himself together whist Kasuka sat in a chair on the other side of Shizuo's bed. Izaya would have stay there even longer but he was starting to feel nauseous again. Izaya stood from his chair on shaking legs as he sat himself on the edge of Shizuo's bed.

He hand a hand over Shizuo's face with a small smile on his face. "I have to go now Shizu-chan. I'll miss you, if it's possible to miss you where I'm going." He leant down and brushed his lips against Shizuo hesitantly. They were warm and soft and everything that Izaya had imagined them to be. He wished he could feel those lips pressing back against him but it wasn't meant to be.

Kasuka took him back to his own room and lifted the raven into his bed. He set the flowers in water and tucked Izaya in. "Thankyou Izaya-san." He said and pressed his lips to the informant's cheek. "I won't ever forget the gift you're giving my brother."

Izaya gave a short laugh. "it's not really a new gift. It's been his for years."

Two days later~

Shizuo was lying in his bed looking up at the ceiling. His brother sat in the chair beside, silently like always. Shizuo laid a hand over his bandaged chest. A new scar would be there to accompany the one that Izaya had given him in high school. The surgery had gone well. A new heart now beats where his old one used to be. It felt warm. Normal. As if it had been his all along.

**Ugh, I wrote something angsty again and made myself cry. Tell me…did you cry too? **


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Sequel is up! It's called 'Live for you'. Thank you so much for all your lovely reviews. They make me so happy. So happy infact that I just had to make a follow up story **


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